Every single one of you deserves to have the nicest, most special day while basking in the glory of love, adoration, and devotion from your family. Mamas, you should get to spend Mother’s Day YOUR way, and I mean EXACTLY how you want it.
Here’s the thing – I don’t want any of you to feel unloved or disappointed because your Mother’s Day didn’t live up to your expectations. And, I certainly do not want you to harbor resentment towards your partner.
How do we ensure that doesn’t happen? We plan our day exactly how we want it to go. Capiche? Right now I want you to do the following:
- Start thinking about how you’d like to spend your day!
- Get your plan together.
- Share your plan with your family.
- Set the plan in motion. (Remember, brunch spots require reservations!)
I can see that look on your face. No, you say? You can’t possibly do that to your partner? You feel guilty thinking he won’t surprise you and shower you with love and devotion because you’re the mother of his children? Well, not to be a Debbie Downer, but you’re not HIS mother; he has a mother for whom he’s probably asked you to buy a present and card. Ladies, admit it – he’s busy and not thinking ahead.
But I’m Not the Only Mom In the Family
We all agree it’s your day, but you have a mom, and he has a mom. How do we get around our moms and mothers-in-law taking precedence over how we spend the day? It’s not easy. I’ll be honest; it can actually be kind of scary. So share how we’d like the day to go for us. (Trust me, I’ve been on the Mother’s Day tug-of-war for 10 years strong now, and it was seven years ago that I decided, “Hey, this is not a good time, and I’m really not happy that this is how I’m spending my Mother’s Day.”)
Here are some ideas on how to compromise:
1) Offer to set a different date to celebrate the grandmas
2) Take half of the day to do what you want, and the rest to show your mom and mother-in-law your appreciation.
So start making plans to celebrate all that you’ve done for your family since becoming a mom. For those of you whose husbands will put together a very special day as thanks? Good for them. They are special men and clearly their moms raised them right!
Wondering how I’ll be spending my Mother’s Day?
I will be at home with my family. It will be a regular Sunday, with the exception that I will excuse myself for a 90-minute massage at 5 PM – meaning I get to escape during kids dinnertime AND bedtime. I’ll return to my three boys in their beds, crawl into my own bed, and watch TiVo with my hubby. After all, I work darn hard for this family. Happy Mother’s Day to me!
Eirene Heidelberger is a certified parent coach and the President & CEO of GIT Mom, a full-service parent coaching firm dedicated to helping Moms get it together so that they have more time to do the activities they most enjoy, while also giving their children the kind of parenting they need! She is happily married and a mother of three boys. Eirene is a workout fiend, loves wine and TiVo (in that order!) and loves her family and friends immensely. Find me on Twitter.
